Sunday, 26 October 2008

soothsaying from the backyard: the Good Oil

I'm not the type of person who says 'I told you so'.
We all make mistakes; we all embarrass ourselves from time to time: the last thing we need is some wanker reminding us (at the worst possible time) that we ignored their priceless advice.

OK, now that the mandatory, qualificative preamble is out of the way, I'm going to:
(1) give myself a hearty pat on the back for delivering a series of rock-solid insights since I started this blog, early in the New Year; and
(2) humbly suggest that you might gain - in at least three senses of the word - from paying closer attention from now on.

This is neither the time nor the place to collate a definitive testament to smugness, so here's just a couple of recent-ish examples which serve to contextualise the current global 'economic crisis'.
(Spoiler: sorry folks, said 'crisis' will remain ONGOING for the best part of a generation until genuine cultural shift kicks in.)

Go back thru my archives and you'll find a few more incredibly accurate analyses. (Pssst. Some have still to eventuate.)

[faintly heard: a lone voice from the Peanut Gallery:]
Stop beating around the bush! Desist from abusing equine species post mortem!
What's your nebulous point this time, Jed?

Right here, my savoury, delicious, nutly friend …
Quite simply, I'm right.
Yes, I'm the first to admit that the highly-nutritious produce from Jed's backyard is seditious and often critical …
random and occasionally querulous …
too-frequently prolix, impenetrable and convoluted.
I remain 50% post-new-age care-bear and 50% self-righteous, bloody-minded mongrel.
I embrace free-spirited rebellion, creative entrepreneurialism and gritty, generous collectivism - all the while, somehow, trying to balance a love/hate relationship with six billion other human beings …
BUT - like it or not - I know what I'm talking about.
AND I always tell the Truth!

Phew. Deadly punchline.

To summarise.
Just get with the program:
I'm giving you these insights for free.
No strings attached.
(Comparison: Late-nite TV Guy want an arm, a leg and both your kidneys for a pile of disingenuous hogwash.)

If you choose to ignore what I'm giving you - and I'm only going to say this once - I bloody-well told you so.

[ Optional homework: ]

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